Hey, I had a great career. No regrets. But I shoulda been an Admiral.
Not that I deserved it or, quite frankly, would have been any good at it; I should have been an Admiral because Admirals have handlers.
I need an aide.
I need someone to manage my schedule and get me where I need to go – on time and in the right clothing. I need a car to pick me up so that I can do emails in the back seat instead of dealing with messy things like traffic.
Admirals get told they are funny, handsome, important, and brilliant. No matter what happens, even when things don’t go as planned, there is someone there to blow sunshine their way.
If I had an office – which I don’t, but if I DID have an office and I WERE an Admiral, someone outside my door would keep out the riffraff.
Unfortunately, being an Admiral is hard. If I didn’t actually have to DO a Flag-level job, and just got to enjoy having people help me, that would be ideal.
Which is probably why I didn’t make Admiral in the first place.