Nah, this isn’t about football. Oh I watched the game alright, and it was a dandy. One of the best ones ever, with a heck of an exciting ending. But this isn’t about that.
This is about the Super Bowl party at my house. To save money we made it pot luck, and that was a mistake.
There was chili, cheese sauce with sausage, ribs, meatballs, and salza. There were desserts. There was cake, and cornbread and chips. There was so much food that I don’t have time to list it all.
And I sampled every last one.
I ate so much that one could have reasonably asked me when I was due.
I ate so much that Wikipedia changed its definition of gluttony to “see Jeff Bacon.”
I ate so much that as of 9pm Sunday cows and pigs were officially placed on the endangered species list.
Any hope of maintaining a low carb diet went out the window when the first chip hit the guacamole, and now lives only in my fading, bittersweet memory of days gone by.
Just like the Seattle Seahawks have had to acknowledge a tough loss, I must recognize my own personal failures. But like the Seahawks (and the Broncos before them), I will live with a resolve to do better from now on. I will set my sights on the next championship game and then I will emerge victorious over my appetite.
Next year will be different.
Until the first chip hits the guacamole.