Whatever happened to uniform shorts? The Navy used to have them in the inventory. I know because I have worn them before. In fact, here is a page right out of the Navy uniform regulations in 1995:
Dapper.
Don’t laugh too hard, ladies, because you had them too.
Suave.
If you look for them now, however, they cannot be found in Navy uniform regulations or just about anywhere else you look. It is as if they were erased from history altogether. Like Stalin did after he had one of his advisors executed.
I have a theory that the tropical attire shorts were akin to the disco-era prom pictures some of us (allegedly) had taken. We know it happened, but we do our best to eliminate any evidence of it.
Why? Because the Navy shorts came complete with knee-high socks…
and an optional pith helmet.
The Brits and the Aussies pull it off somehow, but it just doesn’t seem to work with Americans. An XO of mine – who shall remain nameless since he still reads this blog from time to time – once tried the whole tamale when we were in an undisclosed tropical location: knee highs, pith helmet, the works.
Try as I might, I just can’t erase the image.